How to Write a Resume: See This Before & After Example

Ceylan ThomsonPublished on Date September 2nd, 2009 by Ceylan Thomson
Posted in Category Career & Job
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How to Write a Resume - See this Before & After ExampleYou might have thought about how to write a (green) resume and even looked at resume samples. Chances are, you’ve spent many hours on your resume, carefully selecting the wording and details that you feel accurately portray your experience and achievements. So why hire an outsider to do the same thing all over again? Opting to have a professional resume writer create your resume doesn’t mean you’ve been sloppy or lazy; in fact, it shows you care enormously about how you come across on the page. Here’s an example of a position summary that was carefully created by a marketing professional — and the transformed version that was created by a professional resume writer.

BEFORE:

2006-2008                        SIERRA CORPORATION, Sacramento, California
Marketing Director

  • Worked with internal clients to determine marketing needs, strategies, desires, and goals and used this information to develop new campaigns and ideas.
  • Leader of 6 employees, including sales and advertising staff plus PR professionals.
  • Under my leadership, marketing department revenue grew from $2M to $5M annually, a result of my strong contract negotiation skills and creative marketing ideas.
  • Built marketing campaigns from the ground up, implemented them, and monitored and reported progress and results.
  • Built persuasive case for expanding marketing team from 7 to 10 members to handle more projects simultaneously and improve customer service.

AFTER:

SIERRA CORPORATION, Sacramento, California • 2006-2008
Marketing Director

Devised outstanding, cost-effective marketing campaigns and strategies by interfacing with internal clients to assess marketing needs and objectives. Spearheaded campaign development and execution, from conceptualization through delivery; tracked progress and results and prepared weekly status reports for key stakeholders. Led 6-person cross-functional team, encompassing marketing, sales, and PR staff.

  • Propelled marketing revenue from $2M to $5M annually by conducting skillful negotiations and introducing dynamic campaign ideas.
  • Improved marketing department’s project management capabilities and strengthened customer service by securing executive buy-in to grow team from 7 to 10 members.

EXPLANATION:

The Before example contains a lot of strong elements: detailed descriptions about day-to-day tasks, specific facts about accomplishments, good use of numerals ($2M, 7 members), and a sense of cause and effect (grew revenue by leading negotiations). However, there are also several weaknesses. First, the entire section is formatted with bullet points, which causes the accomplishments to get lost in the shuffle. A reader skimming this section would have to spend extra time trying to pick them out of the more general information about responsibilities. Second, each sentence fails to begin with a strong action verb, which diminishes the impact of the tasks and achievements.

In the After example, the day-to-day responsibilities are written in paragraph form; bullet points are saved for accomplishments. A busy reader would have no trouble seeing at a glance what this client has achieved. Second, each sentence begins with a strong action verb to provide maximum impact. Finally, each accomplishment begins with the result—they get right to the point—and then goes on to explain how that accomplishment was achieved.

The Before version shows care and thought — but the After version takes this position summary to the next level. While preserving the details, it’s more effective in grabbing a reader’s attention and conveying in a concise, dynamic way what has been done and achieved.

Need Resume Help?CleanTechies offers professional resume writing services specifically targeting green positions. Certified expert resume writers with years of experience and almost thousand of resumes written help job seekers at any career stage craft professional resumes. CleanTechies writes resumes targeting roles in renewable energy, resource efficiency, green building, and sustainable transportation as well as other environmental and sustainable positions. CleanTechies is dedicated to helping green job seekers pursue their dream careers.

[photo credit: Flickr]

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